I’ve found myself in a lot of dusty places lately, and as a result of that have been sneezing quite frequently. Any time that someone was nearby, the inevitable “bless you!” is always uttered. But, how and why you need to be blessed is a bit of a mystery.
“I can sneeze, I can change the breeze to winter season.
Wintergreen lime slime looks like Slimer sleepin.”
Before we go any further, let’s lay some foundation on sneezing. It is a reflex, similar to if you dangle your leg off a table and strike just below your kneecap. Give it a test; if you’re about to sneeze, stare into a bright light and it will almost certainly cause the sneeze to occur. That’s a men’s warehouse guarantee.
The use of “bless you” has been a longstanding tradition. It originated during a Plague, in 591 A.D. Rome, when columns from the church would march in the streets chanting blessings. Often, sneezing was seen as the first sign of someone contracting the plague. It was believed that if you were blessed directly after sneezing you would not be affected by the plague. I see how people could believe this, as I’m sure allergies were not seen as a cause of sneezing at that time, so people likely received plenty of false positives.
Honestly, the more I research this topic, the more it seems like an endless rabbit hole.I’ll spare you the intricate details and attempt to highlight some of the more “interesting” history surrounding the subject.
In England circa 1800, there was a rhyme that went as such concerning sneezing:
“Sneeze on Monday, sneeze for danger.
Sneeze on Tuesday, kiss a stranger.
Sneeze on Wednesday, sneeze for a letter.
Sneeze on Thursday, something better.
Sneeze on Friday, sneeze for woe.
Sneeze on Saturday, a journey to go.
Sneeze on Sunday, your safety seek – for Satan will have you for the rest of the week!”
What a way to start the week. With a brief irritant, and simple sneeze, your soul will belong to Satan for seven days. I haven’t been keeping track, but I’m sure that if that is the case, I have a collective year of devil possession in my life. Granted, the science backing ideas 200+ years ago wasn’t quite up to par with science of today, one could surmise that a sneeze on a random calendar day shouldn’t lead to demonic possession.
Enough of the negative, let’s look a bit into how you can use sneezing to increase your luck. Sneezing in these manners will cause you to have “good luck”:
- Between noon and midnight
- If the family cat sneezes, the whole family gets “good luck”
- Turning your head to the right while sneezing
- Sneezing twice
- Sneezing while at the table ensures you will make a friend before your next meal
Bear in mind, stick very closely to the above bullet points, as there are two bad luck omens associated with each of the positive ones mentioned above.
If you want to give the next person who is sneezing a bit of a curve-ball, use the phrase “May God bless you and the Devil miss you”, as it is the unabridged version of “bless you”. Until next week, be wary of your sneezing patterns…